So, the husband is a lover of Hindi films. While, I am a lover of Neeya Naana. Not exactly. But, on the said day when this sambhavam happened, I was intently watching Neeya Naana which had some earth shattering theme of whether ponytails are better or pinnal is better. Or maybe, something along these lines. And, the husband wanted to watch one of his favourite movies of 2013. Special Chabbis.
Woefully, I am the person who insisted on having only one TV at home ‘cos I never watch TV. Okay, almost. Except for a few glimpses of it here and there, may be for about three hours on weekdays and twice as much on weekends. Only.
Anyway, the husband was trying hard to convince me to change the channel and watch his movie. That is when he decided that narrating the story of the film would change my mind. I know. Bad attempt that.
‘You know what.. This guy Akshay along with twenty five other people will invade a lot of high profile people’s houses posing as CBI officers. Then, they’ll loot the money and get it signed by these top shot people as black money. Such an interesting plot, no?’
I look at him. He was awaiting my consent to change the channel. But, you know, I love pony tails and pinnals a lot. I had to counter him.
‘Awesome plot, alright. But, don’t you know Thalaivar and Prabhu did this way back in the ’80s in Guru Shishyan only. And, this with just two of them; not twenty six. Jalaja kooda jalsa.. N. Kalyani.. Don’t you remember? Why are you staring at me? Watch the TV. Gobi’s coat is nice, no?’
End of story!
What? You don’t want the story to end so fast? Okay.. Another anticlimax. Sorry. Aunty climax.
One fine morning, I read my daily-horror-story. I mean, I step on the weighing machine. Surprise surprise. It shows a decrease of two pounds. Yay. I yell so much that the neighbour comes looking if all is okay.
After that, I go about doing my usual chores. Like fighting with the children for my share of chocolate. Eating a piece of cake that looks really neglected. And, then eating one more piece. And, then one more.
Finally, in the evening I take the kids to the park. That’s where I see a fellow apartment mate after about close to three months. She comes hugging wishing me a happy new year and all that. In her quest for being nice, she rattles on.. ‘Oh.. When did I see you last? Three months. You look much more beautiful now. Did you get your nose pierced recently? No? Then, you’ve become fairer, I believe.’
I am seen blushing. People around me wonder what’s wrong. That’s when she chooses to keep aappu – ‘And, looks like you’ve put on a lot of weight!’ So, right. My castles come crashing down. Everyone needs to be put in their places. Even aunties like me!
While I narrate this incident to all and sundry, my mom brings another twist in this story. ‘May be, your friend thought you were pregnant!’ Crie. In protest, I am going to fast until I get back to my pre-teen weight. No.. That’s okay. I don’t need placards and all. Your good wishes alone will do!