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Long time, no kids, no?! Well.. here we’ll have aplenty!

As soon as the kids are back from school, I get nervous about two things.

With Ammu, it is the dress she’s going to ask for. Every day, I mean every day, she comes back home and looks for the same blue and pink frock. The first time she wore it, I told her she looked beautiful. Now, the blue has faded and the pink has become brown with all the sand play. Yet, she wants nothing else. If that frock is drying in the clothesline, she doesn’t mind wearing it even if it’s dripping with water. God forbid, if that blue frock is in the laundry basket without being washed, I am rest assured that day will end with me swallowing a Saridon for sure.

With Kuttan, he doesn’t care about the clothes. While I thought I can breathe a sigh of relief with that, he’s got another fetish. Food. He’ll come home and ask for things right from a restaurant menu card. Noodles. Dosa and podi only. Aloo-chapthi rolls. One day, I didn’t have plain rice at home. I’d made vegetable pulav and generally, the kids are pretty okay with it. Also, if I had to make rice, I was scared I had to gulp down the leftover rice which will be too much for me. So with that noble intention, I refrained from the task. So, this fellow comes home and before he could ask for anything, I told him there’s pulav at home for him. My idea was to make him get excited about it. But, he made a face and said, ‘Amma.. I am not in the mood for eating pulav. Can I just have plain curd rice and some oorkai, please?’ You must’ve seen the shock in his face when I told him there was no plain rice at home. ‘Really Amma.. You didn’t make rice? THERE’S NO RICE AT HOME?!’

Didn’t I tell you how much of a scaredy mum I’ve become?!

Sometimes, when I see the kids, I find a miniature version of me in them.

The other day, the husband had left behind his tiffin box at home by mistake. He had to go half the distance and come back to pick it up. Ammu had seen this and from then on, whenever she is at home when the husband leaves to work, reminds him to take his stuff.

‘Appa.. Have you taken your glasses? Your mobile phone? Your wallet? Tiffin box? Otherwise, you’ll have to come all the way back right? But Appa.. How can you even forget taking them even after we remind you so many times?!’

Kuttan has inherited my sarcasm. I am not sure if I am happy or sad.

Yesterday, the kids were having their dinner while I wanted to use the toilet. It would’ve been a couple of minutes of me ‘resting’ in the toilet when Kuttan comes, knocks and says, ‘Amma.. Are you planning to stay in the toilet till tomorrow morning?’ and stomps off from there. In addition to my toilet chores, I had an additional task of picking my jaw from the floor!

A couple of days ago, I lost my cool.Yeah. I survived the Orange Rhino challenge exactly for a week. Now, you must ask me why I lost my cool. Right. I’ll explain. We were in the skating class and there is a running race session after the class. Ammu and other girls were running when Ammu (I am still not sure if it was by mistake or otherwise!) pushed another child. The other child kept running to her mum crying. Once the class was done, I got the other girl to make Ammu apologise to her. But, my stubborn little girl refused to apologise at any cost. I’ll tell you what. At that moment, I really wanted the ground below me to just split up and swallow me. I really felt I’ve not been raising her well. We came home and I tried to reason with her but no way she was going to budge.  Then, finally I gave up and screamed. I yelled my heart out. No.. I don’t feel happy about it at all but at that moment, I really felt low and had to vent it out. A day earlier, Kuttan had done something along these lines. When both Ammu and Kuttan were running, he pushed Ammu ‘cos she was running before him. And, he had to come first everytime. I thought I was raising good kids but this.. Even now, I feel I am doing something fundamentally wrong with this entire parenting gig. And, I don’t know how to rectify it. Sigh.

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